Artificial Reality
by UhHuhHerMe
Summary: When S.S. meets K.M. on set for the first time. Production of The L Word's second season. Spring of 2005. Vancouver, Canada.
1. Chapter 1

Mid-afternoon. Day is bright; sky is clear. Kate is hanging out with Leisha, Erin, and Mia on the west side of the Coast Mountain Films Studios lot, by a row of trailers providing shade. The gang is sitting at an impromptu-slash borrowed patio set consisting of garden chairs and a low table. There are water bottles on the table, an ashtray, a couple of magazines, and two cell phones. Kate is smoking a cigarette, legs stretched out onto the table, slouched into a chair, sunglasses on. The conversation is flowing, but she's not paying much attention. Leisha is recounting the events of last night's shoot, which stretched out well after one in the morning, sitting next to Erin, who appears to be the only one listening. Mia is lounging, facing Kate, head down, fiddling with her Blackberry. The air is warm. The group is enjoying a rare afternoon break together, under the sun, in between takes. The surroundings are busy. People walking around in all directions, moving from set to set, gaffers and camera operators carrying equipment, racks and stands being wheeled back to the wardrobe department, extras in line at the craft services tent, executives being chauffeured around in golf carts... Another busy day on the studio lot.

Kate glances to the side at one of the production offices for _The L Word_. She sees Ilene emerge out of the door with a petite, curvy brunette in tow. Ilene is pointing different buildings to the brunette, seemingly giving her a tour, all the while walking towards the group. Ilene motions to Kate distantly.

Kate abruptly resumes an upright position on the chair, taking one last puff, and cramming her cigarette butt into the ashtray on the table. « Catch you guys later », she exclaims to no one in particular, getting up, and marching towards Ilene and the brunette without breaking eye contact on the fast approaching duo. Leisha stops in the middle of her sentence, realizing that Kate was not paying any attention to her story, and feigns a battered ego; Erin looks up in disbelief, with a smirk, thinking how typical of Kate to be in her own distant world, as Mia's eyes unabashedly follow Kate walk away, before returning to the small screen of her new gadget. The conversation resumes seconds later, with a pair of eyes rolling and a couple of dismissive shrugs.

Ilene and the brunette stop in their tracks, waiting for Kate to walk over. Ilene is wearing something bland and monotonous; she has her cell in one hand and a bunch of rolled-up scripts in the other. She greets Kate with a smile. Fashion is not her strong suit, Kate silently observes. The brunette, on the other hand, is wearing a tight v-shaped tee, trendy jeans, and cowboy boots. She has long, curly hair, is about 5'5'', and has the most beautiful light brown complexion. She's obviously not from around here. Her sunglasses are skillfully resting on top of her head. Kate removes her own pair of shades to better contemplate Sarah's delicate lines, deftly sticking her sunglasses in the hem of her shirt. Sarah's not carrying anything with her except her car keys, and must have left her things in Ilene's office. She seems nervous, her hands fidgeting with a silver keychain. Her brown eyes immediately catch Kate's attention, who is barely paying attention to Ilene at this point.

« Kate, hi, I want you to meet Sarah, » Ilene speaks up, motioning between the girls. « Sarah's been auditioning for us this morning. I thought I would show her around a bit. »

« Sarah, » Kate repeats, as she extends her hand to the brunette. « Hey. »

« Sarah, this is Katherine Moennig. She plays Shane on the show -- as you might know. »

« Call me Kate. » Kate quickly interjects with a smile.

« Hi, Kate. It's nice to meet you. »

« I was hoping you could spend a little time with Sarah before our sit-down with Rose. » Ilene explains, turning to Kate.

« Sure thing. » Kate smiles at Sarah, again, nodding at Ilene's words.

« You're still available, right? »

« Yes. Absolutely. » Kate happily confirms, finally addressing Ilene.

« Sarah did great this morning. She really impressed us. »

« Did she? » Kate throws in with a grin.

« I just need to see you guys together at this point, and get Rose on board as well. » Ilene explains.

« Right. » Kate nods, knowing the routine.

« OK then, Sarah, » Ilene starts, turning to the brunette, « you're in good hands with Kate. I'll see you guys in a little while. »

« Thanks, Ilene. » Sarah smiles politely.

« In ten? » Ilene turns to Kate.

« Works for me. » Kate replies with a slight shrug.

Ilene turns, smiling at the pair, heading back to her office. She turns around once more and addresses Kate from a short distance. « Oh, we'll be in the main conference room, Kate. »

« Got it, thanks! »

The girls both look at Ilene walk away and disappear through the door. Kate turns to Sarah.

« So, you think you aced that thing, uh? » They start walking in no particular direction, side by side.

« Yeah, I mean... I hope so. » Sarah looks up hesitantly, catching Kate's green eyes.

« I think Ilene likes you. »

« Good. I really need this job. »

« Yeah… and it's a good one, » Kate says with a smirk. « You been in Vancouver for a while then? »

« No, actually, only a couple of weeks, but I haven't seen a lot of the city yet. »

Kate nods quietly, observing her every move. Sarah seems more relaxed now. She has stuffed her keys in her back pocket and is now walking more freely.

« I've just been going from audition to audition, really. »

« Early morning. Late nights. Ordering in? »

« Pretty much. »

« Well, there's definitely a couple of places you need to check out. Leisha and I just discovered the best Tai place in town; last week, in fact. »

« Oh my God, I love Tai! » Sarah exclaims, suddenly blushing at the confession. « And sushi, » she adds more quietly. Might as well get it all out there.

« Yeah? » Kate raises an eyebrow. Finding similarities with this girl is not going to be difficult.

« Yeah… » Sarah's eyes return to the pavement as both girls keep strolling around the studio lot.

« Well, we might need to take you there then; might have reason to celebrate soon enough, » Kate adds with a wink.

« I really hope so. I've heard so much about you guys, about Ilene and the show. I'd love to be a part of it. »

« Yeah, we have a pretty great bunch of people. Tight group. »

« You mentioned Leisha; she's the musician, right? In that band, the Murmurs? »

« Yeah, that's her. I can't believe you know the name of her band. They're pretty obscure still. »

« Are you kidding? I love her music. »

« Oh man, don't say anything to her. We're never gonna hear the end of it. »

Sarah smiles. Conversation with Kate is easy. She almost forgets the pressure and anxiety of the audition process. It's been a long day, and being with Kate is as easy and relaxing as can be.

« Well, I guess I should be showing you around and stuff… » Kate concedes, as they reach the end of the parking lot.

« Right... » Sarah nods with a smile. This is supposed to be a business meeting after all.

« So, basically, » Kate begins, turning around as they backtrack to the trailers, « we're the main production shooting on the lot right now. We're kinda doing the show off-season, being on cable and all; we don't have the same schedule as other shows do on regular TV. »

« So, you guys basically rule this place right now, then. » Sarah questions matter-of-factly, looking up.

« Pretty much! » Kate chuckles. « Seriously, though, it's a great place to work. Everyone's super friendly and relaxed and productive. It's a great working environment for sure. »

« Right, well, this is Canada after all. »

« Yeah. I certainly can see the difference, and I've only just been back for a month or so. »

They continue walking around the lot, conversing, exchanging furtive looks, passing a couple of different sound stages to the right, slowly getting back to where Erin and Leisha are now both sitting by themselves at the tables. Kate spots them right away, and start walking in their direction.

« OK, time to meet the girls. »

« OK. » Sarah responds with a big smile.

They reach the tables.

« Guys? »

Leisha looks up, immediately addressing Kate. « Hey, where have you been? »

« Around. »

« Hey Kate, » Erin interjects, « Rose was looking for you a little while ago. She said to meet her at the office in five or something. »

« Right, thanks. Hey guys, » Kate motions to Sarah on her right, « I want you to meet Sarah... hmmm, I'm sorry, Sarah…? »

« Shahi, but Sarah's just fine. » She responds, extending her hand to both Erin and Leisha. The girls stand up with a warm smile.

« Hi. »

« Hey there. »

« Sarah's been auditioning for Ilene today, I was just showing her around. »

« Cool. » Erin says, dropping her magazine to the table.

Leisha addresses Sarah. « Yeah, you auditioning for Carmen? »

« Yes, I am. » Sarah replies, suddenly gaining confidence.

« Awesome. Yeah, I can already tell you that it's a nice fit. » Leisha teases, pointing her finger at both Kate and Sarah.

« Haha… » Kate throws back with sarcasm. Sarah looks up at Kate and feigns a smile, not exactly sure what to make of this last comment.

Kate senses the brunette tense a bit by her side, and quickly adds, « OK, well, I think we're gonna start heading back. »

« Oh yeah, you need to get ready for this one. » Erin winks at them. Sarah smiles, but once again remains in the dark at what seems to be an inside joke. This is a tight-knit group of friends for sure.

« Well, it was nice to meet you both, » she replies, following in Kate's footsteps.

« Kate, I have an awesome new lipstick you can borrow if you want! » Sarah hears Leisha shout from the back.

« Yeah, yeah… » Kate grunts back, waving her hand. They can hear Leisha and Erin chuckle in the background.

« What was that all about? » Sarah questions.

« Ha, don't worry about it. They're just teasing me; they don't mean any harm. Hey, you know where craft services are, don't you? »

« Yeah, Ilene took me there this morning, actually. Thanks. »

« I bet you haven't eaten much today. Kinda stressful day, uh? »

« Go that right. I had soup for lunch, and I think I just had an apple for breakfast I was so nervous." Sarah giggles.

« Well, it's almost over. » Kate offers, staring from the corner of her eye, adding, « Then you can stuff yourself with pizza back at your hotel. » She winks.

« Uh-huh, no pizza for me. »

Kate rolls her eyes. « Oh, please, like you need to watch what you're eating. »

Sarah blushes a bit, and decides to counter the flirtatious comment.

« Maybe I'll be in the mood for Tai later… »

Kate smiles back as they continue to walk slowly, finally reaching a row of white trailers.

« So here we have the trailers, as you can see. We each have our own tiny _casa_. »

« Very cool. They don't look very roomy, but it must be nice to have a place of your own, just to hang out. »

« It is. Today was a good day, we actually hung out outside a lot, but we do spend a lot of time chillin' inside those big boxes. »

Sarah smiles as she wonders what it would be like to hang out with Kate and the girls.

« Most of these are ours. That's Jennifer's, Laurel's… I think they're both filming right now somewhere. Leisha has hers over there. This is basically our turf. »

This brings another smile to Sarah's face, as Kate continues gesturing at the row of trailers.

« They brought in a whole bunch of new trailers on the other side of Stage 5. I think they're starting a new cop show in a couple weeks. »

« Hmmm, I think you guys have the best spot here, though. » Sarah says with a shrug.

Kate clears her throat.

« By the way, you know what we're doing next, right? With Ilene and Rose. » She turns to the brunette, searching her eyes, then adds, « Why they're asking us to the office? »

« Yeah, she wants us to read together. Rose is the other executive producer, right? »

« She is, but no, that's not it. »

« It's not a read-through? »

« Well… you already auditioned for Ilene and the Showtime execs this morning, right? »

Sarah nods.

« The fact that you're still here, that means you can act, and that they liked you. »

« Well, good. » Sarah shots back.

« Now, » Kate starts, stopping in front of the brunette. « They want to make sure that we're look good together, you know, on screen. »

« Right. »

« You know that Carmen is supposed to be Shane's love interest this season. »

Sarah nods again, still unsure of where this is going.

« Ilene wants to make sure that we have chemistry together. »

« Makes sense. » Sarah agrees.

Kate pauses for a minute, not sure how to phrase the next thought.

« She basically wants us to make out in front of the camera, » she finally spills out.

« Oh. »

« You gonna be OK with that? »

Kate smiles. This is such a dumb question, she realizes, searching Sarah's eyes for any indication that she's not completely freaked out.

« Yeah, I mean, sure… » Sarah blushes a little, then looks down. « I mean, this is _The L Word_, right? » She forces a smile as she looks back up.

« Right. » Kate senses a bit of apprehension in her voice.

« It's just… » Sarah starts, her hand going through her hair, « I didn't expect that part to come up so soon. »

« Yeah. Auditions for this show are a pain; but it should be over after today. »

Sarah looks down at her watch nervously.

« But listen, if you don't feel too comfortable about it, we can... practice for a minute, if you want. » No response from Sarah. « Only if you think that'll help, » Kate adds quickly, with a reassuring tone, « I mean, I know we just met and this is a bit weird but… »

« No kidding. »

Kate laughs. At least, she's honest.

A minute passes.

« Sure, yeah, let's do that. I'd rather not look like a complete dork. »

« OK. My trailer's right there. » Kate offers, pointing to the trailer right behind them.


	2. Chapter 2

Sarah suddenly finds herself walking up the three cramped steps leading to the trailer, following closely behind Kate. She is pleasantly surprised when she enters the mobile home, which turns out to be rather spacious and trendy. Sarah spots what seems to be the bedroom at the end of a narrow hall. The immediate interior consists of a huge couch, an LCD TV up on the wall, a kitchenette with fridge, and an awful lot of cabinets and cupboards; there seems to be all the furniture and equipment of a home.

« Wow! » She marvels. « This is pretty cool. »

« You ever had one of these? »

Kate removes her keys and a pack of cigarettes from her back pocket, and casually drops them on one of the counters. She rests her back against it, facing Sarah, observing her explore the surroundings.

« No… I've never had such a _leading_ role that entitled me to have something like this. And every one of you guys has one of these? »

« Sure. Gotta go somewhere before and after we shoot a scene, right? »

« Right, » Sarah concedes, still looking around.

« Plus, you're not gonna hang around on set naked, are you? »

Sarah skips a beat and looks up, as Kate lets out a chuckle. « Kidding, » she reassures her, with her hands in the air, taking a _don't shoot me_ stance.

« I actually like to hang out on set a lot, » she resumes, clearing her throat. « I always try to show up for Jenn's scenes. »

« Jennifer Beals? »

« Yeah, she's such a great performer… But mostly, I stay here, or squat Leisha's trailer. In fact, we pretty much all squat Leisha's trailer, » Kate adds, giggling, reminiscing all the crazy parties they'd had over there. « She has _way_ more stuff than I do. »

Sarah starts pacing, noticing a PlayStation and a handful of video games scattered on the floor, a skateboard in the corner, and an iPod with headphones on the couch.

« Is this yours? » she asks, pointing to the skateboard.

« Yeah, actually, it is. I started a couple of months back. Ilene mentioned something about Shane being good at it, and that it might come up in one of the episodes or something, so I'd thought I'd try… I have to say, I'm pretty good at it, » Kate declares proudly.

Sarah smiles. « I'm sure you are. »

« Just gotta have balance, you know? I surf, too, so I guess that helps quite a bit. »

« You surf? » Sarah raises an inquisitive eyebrow.

Kate nods again, pleased with herself. She's usually not of a very boastful nature, but for some reason, she wants Sarah to be impressed.

« Not much of a girly girl, are you? »

« Ah, what I can say, » Kate counters with a shrug. « I suppose I'm a bit like Shane that way. »

Back to Shane. Back to the show. Back to the reality that the audition process is not yet over, and that the most difficult part of it might be yet to come. Sarah avoids Kate's eyes for a moment, studying every corner of the trailer to keep herself occupied.

Kate clears her throat, and starts with a banal, « So… » to catch Sarah's attention. « You've never, hmmm, have you done this before? »

Sarah turns around. She finds Kate where she's been all this time, resting her elbows on the counter, leaning her back against it casually, looking relaxed and unabashedly sexy. Her worn-out jeans look damn good on her, and so does her vintage rock t-shirt. Her hair is messy and disheveled, but it looks perfect on her somehow; that hairstyle definitely matches her attitude and personality, and that cute, tomboyish look certainly goes well with her green eyes and black Chuck Taylor's. Sarah starts to wonder how much of Kate truly is the inspiration for Shane.

Wait. There was a question. « Kiss another woman? No, I haven't. » Sarah finally looks up to deliver an honest answer.

« Are you completely freaked out? » Kate surprises her with a resolute stare, challenging her, smiling slightly.

« No. »

« Good. I mean, you might be initially, and a lot of the actors and extras that come in on the show are, but my take is, you know, to just go for it, » she adds, with a shrug, making her point.

« Right. »

« Well, I don't know what Ilene is gonna want us to do this time… »

« What, hummm, what does she usually have you do? For those auditions… » Sarah interrupts, eager to find out more about the _task_ at hand.

« Well, in recent weeks, she just asked us to... make out, basically, and she or Rose Troche, that's one of our directors, would sorta guide us through the moves. »

« Guide you… » Sarah repeats, as if to formulate her uneasiness.

« Bring her closer. More tongue. Lower your hands. Tilt your head to the right… That kind of thing. »

Sarah nods silently. This is going to be more difficult than she thought.

« _Now_ you're freaked out. » Kate chuckles.

« No! No, I… it's just… No, I'm not freaked out. » Sarah tries to convince herself of those words as they are spoken. Deep down, however, she feels like she really wants to try this; like she is ready for this.

« It's actually helpful. Well, sometimes at least; that's how some of the sex scenes on the show are done. »

« Yeah? »

« Mmmm, yeah, depending on the actors and directors, of course. For instance, I know that the first couple of sex scenes with Jenn and Laurel were highly choreographed. It was the first week of shooting; they barely knew each other, and it was kinda new to both of them. Well, mostly Jenn, but now it's like… »

« Now, it's like another day at the office? » Sarah jokes lightly.

« Exactly. Now they both know exactly what needs to be done to make it look good. Most new pairings need the extra help, though. I mean, for me, last season was crazy. I had to _get it on_ with a different girl every other week almost. »

Sarah tries not to roll her eyes. « Really? »

« Well, the story lines for Shane are… _complicated_. » Kate quips. « When you get with a new person each week, and when you know you're never gonna see them again, you just get down to business, like, you don't bother to know them or try to be overly friendly. It's sounds harsh, but the reality of it is, you have a job to do... Leisha and Erin don't know how easy they have it right now. »

« You mean because their characters have been a couple onscreen for a while? »

« Exactly. They don't get the crazy stuff I have to pull each week. »

« That may be, but you're the popular one everyone wants to jump, right? » Sarah blushes the second that comes out of her mouth, but she hears Kate's laughter and forgets about it right away.

« I don't know about that, » Kate taunts, « but from what I understand, everything will change this season. » She tilts her head slightly, raising an eyebrow seductively, and adds, « Looks like I might get a serious girlfriend soon. »

« Right. » Again, this brings them back to what they came in here to do.

« Okay, let's just do it and get it over with, » Kate utters, her hands pushing the counter for leverage as she makes her way to Sarah, slowly.

Sarah readies herself on _her_ side of the trailer. Her own hands come to grasp the counter tile behind her; there's no going back now. Her heart starts to beat faster. She can feel her pulse rage in the back of her throat. Her palms are sweaty. Yet, there is nowhere else she'd rather be. Apprehension gives way to oblivion as Kate steps closer and closer, filling her vision. Kate's green eyes fixated on hers is all Sarah sees.

« So… » Sarah blurts out, in a vein attempt to buy time. « Do you usually do it choreographed? »

« No. » Kate gently shakes her head, her composure poised and assertive. She adds, « I don't really need directions. »

« Oh. » Sarah lets out a sigh. There's nothing else she can think of to say, so she lets Kate take the lead once more.

« I'm gonna kiss you now, » Kate whispers. She leans in slowly, giving her one last chance to change her mind, but Sarah feels hypnotized, and just stands there. She looks up, captured by Kate's penetrating stare, and then down to her lips, slightly parted and already moist. She can feel her breathing on her skin now, and goose bumps on her arms. As Kate closes the distance between them, Sarah manages to let out a faint « Okay. », consenting to Kate's unspoken question.

Their faces are now inches apart. And then she feels Kate's lips on hers, as they both close their eyes. Kate is barely moving, her hands not even touching Sarah. The kiss is tender, soft. Sarah feels the pounding in her chest subside, little by little, as anxiety and disbelief give way to a very warm feeling, inviting, almost appeasing. Kate suddenly moves in closer, as if there were any space left between them - their bodies now connected. She brings her hands up to Sarah's waist, gently resting them there, not forcibly, not pressing, just barely touching. Sarah can feel the connection through the fabric of her jeans even though Kate's fingers are not actually touching her skin. Her heart starts pounding again a little bit louder as a tingling sensation inside her chest is building. Kate tilts her head to the right, gaining easier access, deepening the kiss, this time parting her lips further apart, testing, inviting her in. Sarah suddenly feels her own hands come up to delicately rest on Kate's upper arms, both holding on to her and encouraging her intentions. Kate feels right then Sarah's mind letting go as her lips move over hers gently, skillfully, the kiss growing more passionate, and drawing from Sarah a falling, sighing, almost inaudible sound. Then, Kate pulls away, and they look at each other for a long minute, pupils dilated, flushed cheeks, reddened lips, eyes locked on each other. Without a word, Kate takes a step back, letting go of Sarah's waist, _reluctantly_. Sarah looks down, unable to meet her eyes, bringing a hand to her lips instinctively, as if to remove the imaginary traces of what has just transpired. She eventually brings herself to look back up.

Kate just stands there, in front of her, gauging her reaction, a couple of dark hair strands clouding her gorgeous eyes.

« We should go, » she says, matter-of-factly.

Not expecting this kind of immediate response, Sarah forces a shrug and nods with a mechanical « Okay. »

Kate turns around to go pick up her keys and the pack of cigarettes from the counter, stuffs them in her back pocket, and goes to open the trailer door, disappearing before Sarah's eyes. Sarah gathers herself for a second, taking a deep breath, looking down at her chest for an instant, as if to make sure her heart is still there, beating. She exits the trailer to find Kate waiting for her outside.

« Ready? »


	3. Chapter 3

Late afternoon. Conference room. A bright light shines through the halfway-shut blinds. There is a sizable table in the middle of the room surrounded by black, oddly shaped, ergonomics chairs. A climbing ficus in one of the corners; a water cooler dispenser in another.

Kate swings the door open to find Ilene and Rose at the back of the room in a midst of a conversation, standing. She makes her way over to them, Sarah following closely behind.

« Hey guys, » Kate calls out to them, and goes on to hug Rose.

« Hey you… it's been a while. » Rose returns the hug warmly.

« Ladies… » Ilene begins, folding the script she was holding under her arm, and waves her hand to introduce Sarah to Rose. « This is Rose Troche. »

« Hi. »

« Hi Sarah, it's very nice to meet you. »

« Likewise, » Sarah responds politely.

Ilene then proceeds to detail the agenda.

« Rose is one of our executive producers on the show. She also directs from time to time, and I've asked her to film this part of the audition today. »

« Rose directed our pilot episode, » Kate chimes in, « and the _groundbreaking_ movie _Go Fish_ » flashing her quote-and-quote fingers, mockingly.

« That's right, » Sarah exclaims, « I loved that movie. »

« Well, thank you. »

« She's also set to direct, what is it, our third episode this season, Rose? » Ilene adds, turning to the director.

« That's right, episode 203, » Rose confirms. « A lot of content for Carmen and Shane in that one. »

« Ha haaha… I know what _that_ means, » Kate butts in, laughing, hinting at Rose with a raised eyebrow.

« Well, we're not there yet, » Ilene interjects with a tactful smile, reigning the conversation back in to the subject at hand. « Okay, so let me tell you guys what we're gonna go. We have a scene from the premiere episode, which is actually the first love scene between Carmen and Shane. »

Sarah's eyes seem to cling on every word coming out of Ilene's mouth with undivided attention. Her arms are crossed over her chest, her weight shifting from feet to feet nervously. Kate stands besides her, in silence, nodding to Ilene's remarks with apparent insouciance. She senses Sarah's uneasiness, masked as concentration.

« I'm going to speak up the lines, or directions if you will, from the script, and you'll just follow them as best as you can, without interruptions. »

« Just _go with the flow_, as Kate would say, » Rose cuts in, gesturing towards Kate.

« Right… » Kate responds, with a grin.

« Just don't pay attention to Rose or myself. We'll keep the camera rolling, and we're gonna be standing right here, by the monitor, to give you some room, » Ilene explains, turning to Rose, who takes a couple of steps back at that moment.

Ilene continues, « This is one of the two scenes we have in mind, and we're not quite sure how this is going to go yet, but it's perfect for what we're doing now. Think of it as a rehearsal. Sarah, do you have any questions? »

« Uhmmmmm, so there's no actual dialogue, just… »

« Right. We're still undecided as to the opening line between these two leading up to the scene, so let's not have any dialogue for now. »

« Okay, » Sarah blurts out.

« We just need to see the chemistry between you two on camera. » Ilene turns to Kate. « Kate? »

« Yeah, got it. »

Kate acquiesces. She doesn't need to hear any more. She already knows what to expect. She knows what to do.

« Okay, you guys stand by the table right here; you're gonna need it, and we'll move out of your way. »

Ilene takes a step back. Rose is taking a handheld camcorder with shotgun mic out of its case.

« Give me a second, guys. » she announces as she starts playing with the auto-focus settings.

Kate and Sarah move closer to the table, standing right next to it, facing each other. Kate looks around to the side, then back to Sarah, smiling, then to Ilene and Rose on her left. Her right hand touches the table, her fingers wriggling on the beech-veneered surface. Sarah keeps looking down and back up to check on Kate, her fists clenched, struggling for control. Kate seems decidedly relaxed and confident. One of her shoelaces is untied. The vision of her in these clothes, her nonchalant stance, pouting lips, piercing eyes, and her sexy, choppy hairstyle, eases Sarah into character. This is Shane, and this is an audition. This isn't real. She's playing a role. Carmen. This is acting. She _is_ supposed to find Kate attractive. She _is_ supposed to find her scent arousing, her features appealing, her presence intoxicating. That's the character she _is_ supposed to play — and it couldn't be any easier. Focus. Relax. Concentrate. Breathe.

The wait is excruciating. Sarah doesn't know what to do next. She glances to her right again. Rose has now connected the camcorder's feed to a monitor she has set up nearby. Ilene is browsing through the rumpled script, a pen in her hand.

« Okay, the scene is this; you're in some back room or recording studio on the lot of a movie or television set. Carmen works there, as a production assistant, and Shane happened to have a hair job there that day. Carmen sort of lured Shane in the back room to listen to a mix she made for one of her DJ-ing gigs. This is the first time that they are alone. »

Kate and Sarah get ready, facing each other once again, shoulders straightened up, arms loose, trying to let go of the tension. They both try to get into character with the limited description of circumstances surrounding the scene. Their look, _on each other_, is intense. Kate breathes calmly; Sarah's heartbeat goes a little faster, which doesn't go unnoticed. Both await the next set of directions.

« We're rolling, » Rose announces, as she points the camera towards the static duo.

« Alright, » Ilene begins, « the scene reads: Shane fixes Carmen intently, approaching closer. Carmen smiles subtly, her eyes growing darker with a mix of desire and trepidation. »

Ilene looks up from the page she is reading from and watches the pair execute her directives. The atmosphere and energy in the room has now completely shifted. Silence is paramount. Concentration. Edginess. Tension. Everything is intensified. Ilene observes the actors in silence as Rose films beside her. She catches the scene unfolding before her on the monitor for a moment. Rose has them both in her frame, zooming in as Kate takes a step closer.

Sarah's eyes don't leave Kate's lips. She now feels the warmth of Kate's breath on her cheek but she doesn't move. Kate restrains own her hands from reaching for Sarah's waist; she leans in ever so delicately as Sarah draws in a quick breath, in anticipation.

Ilene's eyes return to the white page and she continues reading, satisfied with what she is seeing. « Shane goes to grip Carmen's waist and brings her closer to her, their bodies now touching. »

Kate takes a hold of Sarah's waistband, pulling her close, catching a belt loop on either side with her fingers, causing Sarah to jerk forward slightly, the contact of Kate's leg between her own sending a shudder down her spine. Sarah's hands come to caress Kate's upper arms, and start moving up to her frail shoulders instinctively. As she briefly looks down at her hands, she realizes she acted prematurely, and sudden anxiety grips her, as she hears the liberating words, « Carmen grasps Shane's arms, craving the proximity. Her eyes close as Shane leans in for a tender kiss. »

Kate's moist lips are already on Sarah's when she registers those last words, and, as unprepared as she is mesmerized, the brunette just closes her eyes in oblivion. Kate tilts her head further to the right, deepening the kiss. Her hands drawing small circles on Sarah's back, pulling, bringing her closer.

« Carmen breaks the kiss gently and, still mere inches away from Shane's face, looks deeply into her eyes, searching for a symbolic promise. Carmen's right hand comes to caress Shane's face, and their lips meet again, the kiss growing _more_ passionate this time. »

Ilene pauses, watching the spoken words take a life of their own.

Kate is now kissing Sarah with increased fervor and intensity, her tongue fiercely exploring Sarah's mouth, barely coming up for air, the kiss both heartfelt and hot-blooded. Sarah's fingers come to spontaneously play with Kate's dark layers at the back of her head, their heated tongues still moving in perfect unison.

Ilene stands there for a minute, reduced to silence, caught in the moment, feeling like an uninvited bystander. She returns to the script quickly, turning the page.

« Shane pushes Carmen against the workstation, grinding against her, never breaking contact with Carmen's lips. She lifts her up on the surface of the mixing console, her legs resting between Carmen's. »

Kate proceeds as instructed, Ilene's words resonating like distant echoes in the back of her head. Her attention is on Sarah, and Sarah only, as she corners her against the table, lifting her up with dexterity, positioning herself between her legs. Sarah's arms are now circling Kate's neck, both holding on to her and relishing the sizzling closeness between them. She breathes heavily, aroused and enthralled, when Kate finally breaks the kiss, gasping for air herself. Everything is blurred. Walls are suddenly closing in as their eyes lock. Their breathing uneven, rapid, both confounded at their own state of arousal. Sarah licks her swollen lips as Kate watches hungrily, impatiently. Just as Sarah musters up enough courage and stamina to lean in again, she hears, « Okay, I think that's enough. »


	4. Chapter 4

Today is Monday. Today is Sarah's first « table read ». Erin and Leisha are standing outside the production building, braving the morning breeze. Leisha is smoking. Erin is pacing, arms crossed over her chest, trying her best to be the supportive friend that she is. It's a quarter to eight. The parking lot is still empty.

« Isn't smoking bad for your voice or something? » Erin sneers, giving the blonde a disapproving look.

Leisha takes another puff and returns a deadpan expression with, « Fuck off. »

« Okaaaaaaay, grumpy pants. »

« Alright, I'm sorry, » Leisha concedes, « It's just… it's not that easy, you know? »

« Apparently. » Erin smirks in triumph, both of them eventually dismissing the conversation they've had a million times with a good laugh.

Sarah makes her way over to the duo, car keys dangling from one hand, a bottle of water in the other. « Morning guys. »

« Sarah, hi! » Leisha greets her, putting out her cigarette butt against the sole of her shoe, waving in the air to dissipate the smoke.

« Hey! » Erin chimes in.

Leisha leans in to give Sarah a quick hug. « How are you? Congrats! » she exclaims, patting her gently on the back.

« Yeah, welcome! We're so glad to have you here. »

Sarah raises an eyebrow, returning the hug gingerly, and responds, « Hmmm, thanks. How did you know, though? I just signed the contract with my agent an hour ago. »

« Oh, we… »

« We knew. » Leisha blurts out.

« How? Since when? »

« Well… » Leisha starts, feigning to think it through, when she hears Erin spill the beans.

« Since Friday. »

« Friday? When I was here auditioning? » Sarah questions, with increased skepticism.

« Remember when Kate was showing you around? » Leisha begins, then sighs, deciding to tell all.

« Yes. »

« And when she introduced us to you? »

« That's when. » Erin cuts in once again with a goofy smile, nodding in agreement.

« Okay. Let's just say Kate isn't usually the heartwarming and bubbly type, » Leisha states matter-of-factly. « I mean, she can be, with a certain amount of alcohol in her veins, but… »

Erin and Sarah chuckle in unison.

« She's kinda shy and reserved around people she doesn't know. She never showed any of the girls around, or spent time with them before auditions or anything like that. Also… » Leisha pauses, capturing Sarah's full attention, « She talked about you. »

« Man, how many girls did they have lined up for this part? » Erin asks abruptly, trailing off, turning to Leisha and leaving Sarah to roll her eyes.

« Well, Kate saw at least one each day for the last two weeks, sometimes two a day… » Leisha responds, mentally reminiscing.

« I'm sorry, I still don't get it, » Sarah finally cuts in, bringing them back to the subject at hand. « Kate and I got along fine, so what? »

« Well, when the Showtime people green-light you, then it's basically up to Ilene. And for the part of Carmen, I think Ilene just let Kate have her way. Considering that Carmen is gonna be Kate's love interest for the _entire_ season… »

« Shane's. » Erin rectifies with a knowing grin. « Shane's love interest. »

« Right, and since _Kate_ is gonna be spending most of the time making out with her, she might as well like the girl, ya know? »

Erin and Leisha both turn to fully face Sarah, smiling from ear to ear.

« So, Kate liked you enough to wanna make out with you all season, basically. »

« Basically, » Leisha echoes, nodding solemnly, leaving Sarah to freeze at the last words uttered.

« Don't look so shocked. » Erin gently punches Sarah in the shoulder, bringing out a bland smile out of her. « You gotta make sure things click, right? »

« Right. » Sarah looks down, developing a pink tinge in the face. She pushes a strand of dark silky hair behind her ear as Leisha speaks up.

« Reminds me of that story Jennifer told us about how Laurel got hired. It was down to two girls, Laurel and some other girl, and they both visited Jennifer on set and spent some time with her, and while it didn't work out with the other girl, it clicked with Laurel right away. »

« Yeah, they totally hit it off, » Erin concurs.

« Long story short, we knew Ilene was gonna let Kate weigh in, and we knew Kate liked you when you came in, so… »

« Voilà. »

« I'm not sure I should've asked. » Sarah admits with a sigh. As she follows Leisha's inquisitive stare behind her, she turns around and sees Kate walking over, her messy head wrapped in a dark gray hoodie.

« There she is, » Leisha signals in Kate's direction. « Morning! »

« Thanks for joining us, » Erin teases, checking her wrist for the time.

« Shit, man, it's too early for wisecracks. » Kate uncovers her head in the most careless and boyish motion, and leans into Leisha for their routine, morning hug. « Hi, » she groans. She goes to give another quick embrace to Erin.

« Had your coffee yet? » Erin asks.

« I wish, » Kate rolls her eyes at them, confirming caffeine deficiency, and then turns to Sarah, lowering her head slightly.

« Hey, » she mutters to the brunette in a softer and more intimate tone of voice. She leans in and gives her a kiss on the cheek.

Sarah blushes at the unexpected gesture. She smiles, manages to respond with a vapid « Hi, » and dismisses the awkward encounter, promptly turning to Erin. « Should we go in? »

« Yeah, let's go get coffee. »

Erin takes off, Sarah following behind, thankful for the interruption. She hears Leisha joke at Kate's expanse in the back. « Why don't _I_ get a French kiss in the morning, ugh? »

« Leish… not now. »


	5. Chapter 5

Early afternoon. Studio lot. Craft services area.

« You got your reserved parking spot yet? » Leisha shifts uncomfortably on the metal patio chair, squinting at the bright sun, legs stretched out in front of her.

« Yes, got the tags on Friday. It's way back on the other side of Stage Two. » Sitting across at the table, Sarah rotates the cup of iced tea in front of her, her fingers playing with a ruffled napkin.

« Right, with the rest of the latecomers. » Leisha picks up her black D&G sunglasses from the table and puts them on, scrunching her nose, relieved at the immediate comfort they provide.

She adds, « Still no luck on the trailer? »

« Nope. »

« You need to ask Rose, she'll make that happen in a sec. » Leisha's pointy finger in the air emphasizing her words.

Sarah exhales deeply. « It's not that bad. My parking space is right by Kate's trailer, actually, so it's pretty convenient. »

Leisha's face lights up with a flashy grin. « Speaking of, how is ol' Kate treating you these days? »

« What do you mean? » Sarah takes a sip, leading her on.

« Well, it's been a full week already. Anything you care to share? »

Leisha's raised eyebrows cause Sarah to relinquish a silly giggle.

The blonde insists. « How was your first shoot? »

Sarah sits up in her chair, clearing her throat. « Fine. »

« Eh, let me rephrase that… » Leisha leans forward, elbows resting on the table, and, pulling her sunglasses down her nose a bit, reveals an inquisitive stare, « how was your first _sex_ scene? »

« It was fine, » Sarah snaps back with an insouciant shrug.

« Please, hold off on the details! »

Leisha curbs the goofy smile forming on her lips, giving her co-star some time to collect her thoughts.

« Well ? » She finally presses.

Sarah sighs. « This first week has been interesting for sure… » And pauses.

« It's been great, actually. I really enjoyed the group scene we shot at The Planet. And I loved watching Jennifer's scene, too. The fight with Tina in their bedroom, you know? »

« Yeah, when she yells her name as Tina walks out the door? »

« Yeah… That was intense. I'm so star-struck around Jennifer. »

Leisha leans back into her chair, a gentle breeze suddenly picking up. « You'll get over it… We all did. » She smiles. « I heard they're trying to get more group scenes in this season, which should be fun. »

Sarah nods, « I hope they do. It's such a riot when we're all together. »

Another pause. « Such a different atmosphere too, being surrounded by women like this. It's almost… _liberating_. »

« Yeah, we're a pretty good group. We get each other. »

The conversation echoing Kate's words when they first met brings a sudden smile to Sarah's face. She reluctantly wishes the memory of that encounter away, and takes another sip from the cold beverage in front of her.

Leisha continues. « We have so much fun it gets ridiculously out of control sometimes. »

Sarah frowns, mildly intrigued.

« Well, it's getting to a point right now where Erin and I have to make out all the time, and it's just _hys-teri-cal_. »

« Oh, yeah. That must be weird. »

« It really is. Giggle attacks drive the directors nuts, especially Ilene. Had one of those yet? »

« Uhm, no, not really. » She looks into the distance, then back at Leisha. « Don't get me wrong, I've had a blast when all of us are on set, but otherwise, it's been pretty serious. »

« Right. Mama Chaiken directed that first episode, the season opener, right? Where you and Kate… »

A blush spreads across Sarah's face.

« Yes, » she cuts in immediately.

« Yeah, she's pretty intense with sex scenes. She really wants to make 'em right. »

« Well, that one… », struggling with the word, « scene, Kate and I sort of rehearsed it during my audition a couple of weeks back. So I wasn't as intimidated. »

« Right, the _fuck-in-the-music-room_ scene? The day Shane and Carmen meet for the first time? »

Sarah nods again, smiling at Leisha's comfort level and blunt language.

« Angela snatched the dailies of that episode, somehow. She said it is badass. »

Suddenly feeling self-conscious. « I don't know about that. »

« All of Kate's sex scenes turn out to kick everyone else's ass, pardon my French, which is really unfair if you ask me. »

« What does that mean exactly? » Feigning a nervous laugh.

« Nothin'. It's just hard to make her look bad on camera in one of those scenes. She's got that look, ya know? That, and she always gets the best lines. _And_, the best fuck buddies. »

Sarah looks blank.

« Yep, you got a lot to live up to, sista… », Leisha purses her mouth in a self-satisfied smug, « but something tells me you'll do just fine. »


	6. Chapter 6

Sound Stage 23. Late night. Kate makes her way over to Angela, ducking from spot lights and all sorts of lighting equipment hanging around the set, traversing a sea of thick cables on the laminated floor.

« Hey Ange, » she announces from behind, making herself known to the director, and following up with a customary hug as Angela turns around with a smile. « Hey you. »

« Sorry I'm late. »

Kate removes the dark gray beanie hat off of her uncombed head in one swift motion and scratches her forehead apologetically.

« You're not. We're running a little behind. I need to go talk to Rose, actually. I won't be long. »

Angela motions over to the large bed on set discreetly, where Sarah is waiting, lying under the sheets uncomfortably. « I don't think it's in my interest to keep that bundle of nerves waiting much longer. »

Kate's eyes find her there from the distance, and without breaking visual contact with the unclothed brunette, she volunteers, « I'm gonna go talk to her. »

« Good. I'll be right over with you guys. »

« Mmm'kay. »

With a light stroke of the hand on Kate's shoulder, Angela takes off.

Kate, calm and composed, walks over to the queen bed in the middle of the set. It is rigged with light stands, dolly tracks, and white reflectors. She spots Jo Ann, one of the make-up artists, getting her assorted cosmetics and tools organized on a nearby workstation. She flashes her a polite smile and redirects her attention to Sarah.

The brunette exhales with relief at the familiar face, « Hi. »

She nervously readjusts the large pillow on her back against the black headboard, on the right side of the bed.

Kate comes to stand on _her_ side of the bed, to the left. « Hey. » She looks around, evaluating her surroundings. « Sorry for keeping you waiting… Lost track of time playing with Floyd, » she explains with a sudden irritated temper, all the while taking her black denim jacket off. « Then, arrrrgh, the shower in my trailer wouldn't work. »

She sits down on the easy chair next to the bed to untie her Converse's shoe laces.

« No problem. Angela said they needed a few minutes anyway. »

Kate nods, removing her socks, and shoes, one by one. She stands up, her hands already working on the clasp of her belt buckle when she hears, « What are you _doing_? »

She looks up to find a pair of confused brown eyebrows, and replies casually, « Uhmmmm, getting undressed? »

Sarah looks her up and down, a crooked smile forming at the corner of her mouth. « Don't you need… »

Kate goes on to unzip her jeans casually, revealing _Shane's_ signature white boy shorts. Sarah forces her eyes up at the sight of porcelain flesh, wishing away the sudden blush on her face.

« Oh, no, I don't do the _robe thing_. » Kate pauses, smiling at her co-star's wandering eyes, and proceeds to slide off her jeans.

« I just show up and… get naked. »

A smirk creeping up on her face.

Sarah chuckles timidly in the back of her throat at the blunt statement, or, she wonders briefly, is it because Kate is now standing in a white, v-necked, loose t-shirt over very _short_ boy shorts. And nothing else.

Looking around the room aimlessly one more time, Kate concludes, « I mean, it's a closed set and I don't really care anymore. It's just easier. »

Flashing a goofy grin, « For me anyway. »

Shoes are kicked to the side, the pair of jeans carelessly thrown onto the easy chair. Sarah barely has time to study the tall frame before her eyes, or to linger on what she discerns to be Kate's perfectly sculpted abs.

Reality strikes back as Jo Ann approaches on her left to apply a last-minute touch of shadow over her eye lids. Sarah feels a sweep of blush on both of her cheeks and thanks the make-up artist politely when she leaves.

Kate slides in between the sheets effortlessly. Tilting her head to the left, she finds Sarah's caramel eyes fixated on her.

Her voice low and appeasing, she whispers, « How are you doing? »

Sarah forces a dismissive shrug. « I'm fine. »

The response betrayed by her clenched hands tightening the cotton sheet against her bare chest.


	7. Chapter 7

Angela comes up to them and squats down in front of the bed, on Sarah's side, her hand holding on to the mattress for balance.

« Hey guys. Sorry about that. We're setting up the third camera right now. »

Kate and Sarah, with their backs against the bed's headboard, both return an unfazed look to the director.

Sarah's overly candid response, « No problem. »

« Great. You guys ready to rock? »

Kate's response comes as an impassive nod.

« Okay, let's do a quick run-through before we start rolling. From the top? » Angela pulls out a rumpled script and starts going through pages, stopping at a yellow page flag.

Kate knows the drill. She clears her throat. « Skipping the dialogue, » sounds like a statement more than a question.

« Yeah, straight to the action. I wanna make sure I get everything we need in the frame. »

Angela is immersed in the written lines on paper before her when Sarah gracefully lowers herself onto the pillow. The brunette keeps a tight hold on the sheets covering her denuded body.

Kate does the same, settling into a familiar position, and turns left, facing Sarah head on.

Their eyes meet. An unspoken understanding is exchanged.

Propped on her elbow, and tentatively, Kate starts gesturing, « Okay. I'm gonna… »

_This is what the reality of the scene is. This is the job. This is me and you, and we have to make it work. We have to make it real._

« Yeah. » Sarah's timid smile is soft and restrained, yet granting Kate permission to invade her personal space.

Kate moves in closer, lying on her side, inches away. She motions a cautious hand over Sarah's form. « Is that okay? »

« Yeah, of course. »

Sarah, looking up as if trying to delay the imminent contact, lifts the sleek piece of cloth up for Kate to move in and position herself on top of her.

« 'kay. »

She does so with expert and tactful dexterity, resting her frail body against Sarah's warm skin.

Both of them are wearing underwear. That is _all_ Sarah is wearing.

Kate now lies on top of Sarah, the contact both electrifying and soothing, even through the cotton shirt Kate has left on for the run-through.

Angela looks up to find Joe in the corner of the room, angling his camera towards the bed. « Good, alright, let me see this, » looking over the script one more time, « Joe, you got this angle covered? »

Angela gets a silent thumbs up from the camera operator. Sarah's face is at close range.

Kate looks straight into Sarah's eyes. She finds a pool of brown uncertainty staring back. She hesitates, and then, « Can you, uhm… », a lopsided grin forming on her lips, « spread your legs a little? »

Sarah blushes at the blunt demand, but understands quickly, « Oh... I'm sorry. Like this? »

And she executes, allowing Kate to shift her weight to her right arm and leg, « Yeah, so I can rest my knee between your legs. Thanks. I don't want to be crushing you the whole time. »

Kate's smirk meets a pair of rolled eyes filled with light mockery, « Yeah, right. »

Kate feigns a bruised ego with another layer of endearing silliness.

She clumsily readjusts the hem of her shirt over her abdomen amid stirs of ruffled sheets and shifting bodies. Their bare legs are intertwined under the sheet, the warmth of their skin touching lifting off a veil of self-consciousness and past discomfort.

« Ange, it's pretty much kissing from that point on. Do you want us to…? »

« Yes, go for it. »

Without much warning, Kate leans in and stops shy of a millimeter from Sarah's face. Her eyes take in the glowing bronzed skin, the delicate features, the lips. The perfectly sculpted crimson lips.

Kate's eyes are suddenly transfixed, her pulse spiraling inside of her chest. Lust and desire are palpable. Sarah catches on to it and parts her lips unconsciously, aroused.

Sarah's hands come to rest hesitantly on either side of Kate's waist under the covers, letting the cotton fabric of Kate's shirt absorb the moisture off of her quivering palms.

Seconds later, Kate's lips are on her lips. A slow, sensual kiss, at first, Kate's fingers playing with strands of long, silken, curly hair, marking her territory. Kate's mouth hovers over Sarah's smooth lips, lingering, gliding — they taste of peppermint coffee and vanilla lip gloss. Perfect combination. A match made in heaven.

Eyes closed, breath heavy, heartbeat pounding in her chest, Sarah feels her own body gradually relax under Kate's reassuring touch, under the dainty body resting above hers. Kate's kiss is gentle yet passionate, urgently sweeping her tongue over Sarah's lips, asking for permission.

Sarah realizes then she's never had anyone who cared enough before. For the most part, men just pounced on her unapologetically, both in life and on screen. Not one had ever made her feel like her kiss was a gift, that her consent mattered. Why did it have to be _her_ to give her this?

Feeling something warm, something inviting inside her, a burning sensation, Sarah opens her mouth in pleasure, their tongues meeting for the first time in a heated embrace.

Their eyes are closed as the kiss deepens, leaving them panting, their breaths uneven, when Angela suddenly cuts in.

« Okay, that's good. »

Kate pulls back, a breath away, and blinks. She turns her head to the right, slowly emerging from the moment. _Right, there's a script._


	8. Chapter 8

« And then, you go on to kiss her neck… »

Both girls are now facing the director, waiting for instructions, regulating their labored breathing.

« Sarah, when she's kissing your neck right there, and your left hand goes down her back, you're gonna want to get the sheet with your fingers, and go as low as you can. »

Angela allows Sarah to execute the directions. She does, and with a still febrile hand, she pulls the sheet down Kate's shoulder to her waist.

« Right, it's like you're caressing her back, and showing the camera more of her skin at the same time. »

Kate, still lying on top of her costar, watches her avid expression, amused, and dramatically aroused.

« You can go as low as my underwear, » she whispers, her eyes watching Sarah's fingers as much as her position allows.

Angela nods, « Yeah, we really want to show as much skin as possible, » and returns her attentive eyes to the script, « Kate, go back to kissing her neck for me? »

Kate moves back up a bit and leans forward, her elbows propped and resting on either side of Sarah's shoulders on the mattress.

She looks up, not letting her full weight press down, barely realizing the awkwardness of the situation with Angela standing so close to them.

« That's it. Bill? How's the close-up on Sarah? »

The discreet and seemingly jaded man starts mumbling something back. Satisfied with the answer, Angela stands up, wincing, and leaves the girls with, « Good. Alright, I'm gonna let you guys work out the _under-cover_ details while I close the set. »

With a knowing look, she takes off.

« Uhm, the what? » Sarah asks sheepishly, turning to Kate, whose face is still very much there, still a few inches away.

Kate's eyes are full and reassuring, though, and when she clears her throat to explain things further, « Oh, our, uh…ehh-emmm, hand… placement, » she flashes Sarah a big cocky smile.

« Oh. »

Taking the lead once again, Kate proceeds to break the scene down.

« Okay, so, when I'm over here, » she leans in to the right, closing in on Sarah's neck, again, « my left hand is gonna travel from your face down. »

She looks up, waiting for an unspoken sign from Sarah to allow her to touch her cheek. « I'm gonna… is that okay? »

« Yeah. »

Kate's warm palm on her round cheek.

« So, from here, and I'm still kissing you all the while, my hand's gonna go down here, » she pauses, gauging Sarah's reaction to her fingers on her pulsing neck.

« Down… »

Her hand on her collarbone, lingering there.

« Go ahead, it's okay, » the brunette exhales as she feels long fingers trail down to momentarily rest on her breast.

Kate's husky voice, « Down… » Her hand now grazing Sarah's taut stomach.

« Down to here, » she continues, finding her way to Sarah's inner thigh, under the sheet. « And I'm just gonna keep it here the whole time, as close as possible to, uh, you know. »

Sarah looks up, exhaling a long breath she didn't realize she was holding in. « Yes. »

With that, Kate suddenly pulls herself off of Sarah, returning to her original position on her side of the bed.

With a shrug, « It's pretty realistic. That's usually how we do it. And the camera's not gonna go that far. There's just gonna be a lot of close-ups on our faces and hands. We just… »

Sarah continues the thought instinctively, bringing the sheet back up to cover herself once again, « Need to get the illusion of the movement right. »

« Exactly. »

Kate grabs a bottle of water by the nightstand and takes a few sips.

« So, was that okay? You're okay with… everything? »

« Sure. »

« Listen, you need to tell me if anything feels or makes you feel uncomfortable. »

« I'm fine. Don't worry about me, » Sarah promises, feeling relieved and empowered that the first _contact_ has been made and that everything feels like it's going to be alright.

And then, with furrowed eyebrows, « So I'll just, maybe... grab the back of your neck or just have my hands on your back during all of this? »

Kate shrugs again, titling her head to the side this time, and smirking with those adorable, pursed lips.

« Yeah, whatever you like. In this scene, I'm doing… I mean Shane is doing most of the _work_, and this one particular motion needs to be on camera, that's why we rehearse it, but otherwise I don't usually choreograph anything. »

It's Sarah's turn to smile now. « Right. That's what Leisha said, » she replies playfully.

Kate lets out a hearty laugh.

« You talked to Leish about my sex scenes? »

« Well… »

« Man, she is such a big mouth... Alright, well, everyone's got a different way of doing things, you know? My take is, just go with the flow, with whatever feels right… »

Sarah studies Kate left and right. The woman lying next to her is Shane personified. It's almost like an out-of-body experience.

The confidence, sexiness, and magnetism exuding from Kate are overwhelming. It's almost difficult to tell them apart, and even harder to concentrate on the scene.

« … And Angela, or whoever directs, they will let you know if they need more leg or more kissing and what not. »

Sarah nods, at a loss for words.

« I'm just used to working with Ange, and she knows how I work. »

As if on cue, Angela reappears with her reading glasses on. « Time for my motivational speech? » she asks bluntly, winking at the girls.

« Yes, » comes out of Sarah's mouth as a liberating sigh. She looks back at Kate, demure and blushing, and once again finds a smile at the corner of her lips.

« Okay, Sarah, I know this is sorta your first _real scene_, » Angela begins, using finger quotes, « and I want you to know that you can have as many takes as you want. »

The director's assurance and poise capture both Kate and Sarah's attention.

« It's just gonna be me, Bill, and you guys in the room. Everyone else is locked out. We're gonna film just the scene, no dialogue, so that it's out of the way. I still don't like the opening lines and want to find a way to spin this without alienating the writers… »

Angela addresses Kate directly. « I want you guys to really go for it. »

« 'kay. » Kate signals her understanding with a telling blink.

« Sarah, I know you're gonna do great. Everything you guys just did in the run-through was awesome. Just follow Kate's lead if there's any problem, or if you have any… hesitation. »

The brunette acquiesces. This is it.

Angela offers a warm smile and returns to her camera and adjacent monitor a few feet away. She puts headphones on with her last words, « Whenever you guys are ready. »

Kate removes the shirt briskly off of her shoulders and drops it, along with the bottle of water, by the bed frame, out of the camera's angle view. She settles herself back into position at the center of the bed. Sarah has already lowered herself onto the pillow, just as she did before.

Echoing Angela's comforting words, Kate murmurs to her, « Just look at me if you get lost. » Her voice husky and strong.

« I'm not sure what that means, » she counters, chuckling, averting her eyes from Kate's bare chest. All she can think of right now are their two naked bodies under the sheet, save for boy shorts and a black lacy bikini.

And then she hears it.

« And… action. »

Kate turns with familiarity and a certain ease to her left. She stares at Sarah, long enough for the brunette to wonder if she's the one supposed to make a move. She's not. Kate lingers her eyes on her face and suddenly she is self-conscious, her brownish eyes looking for comfort, reassurance. She finds it with the gentle touch of Kate's hand when her long, delicate fingers come to brush her cheek.

Suddenly, the air shifts, becomes intense, and thick. Kate leans in and drops her head close to Sarah's, their lips grazing one another.

Kate hovers over Sarah for a moment, breathing her in, her body already leaning against Sarah's feverish skin. Her caramel eyes are bright and alert. The way she bits her lower lip slightly lets Kate know she is nervous.

And then Kate closes the distance between them and kisses her lips. The contact is once again galvanizing, but the kiss is different this time. It depends immediately, sending shivers down Sarah's spine. Practice time is over.

Their tongues meet as they open their mouths eagerly, fueling a more passionate kiss. A hungry kiss.

As they rehearsed moments before, Kate moves in delicately and props herself up on top of Sarah, laying there, finding that place between her legs to position herself. Sarah's hands are on her waist once again. The kiss never breaks. Eyes closed, they let the strong and barely controllable emotion take over. Kate tilts her head further and the kiss deepens even more. As Sarah exhales a low, repressed moan against the soft lips, she knows that they are way past the point of no return.

Kate's fingers find their way up to dark, silky strands of brownish hair on the pillow.

Under the sheets, their legs are interlaced. Sarah's heart starts racing and she suddenly feels warm, hot, sweltering, her breasts brushing against Kate's bare chest for the first time, and this never-ending kiss messing with her head. Her hands travel up and down Kate's back, relishing the contact, and then, only then does she remember the one thing she's supposed to do.

As Kate moves away from her lips and continues on to leaving a trail of wet kisses down her neck, Sarah finally catches her breath, eyes still shut, and she grabs the cotton sheet subtlety between her fingers and proceeds to pushing it down slowly, in one gentle stroke, leaving Kate's pale back exposed.

Sarah regains control of her senses gradually, turns into Kate, ready for more, panting in her ear, feeling Kate's back muscles clenching under her touch.

Then, Kate's hand is on her cheek. Her palm is dry and soft, yet strong and confident, her fingertips tracing the contours of Sarah's cheekbone, her jawline, sliding down to the softness of her neck, dancing, playing with strands of hair, and moving on to her collarbone. And her breast.

Kate looks up, just for an instant, and captures Sarah's lips once more with small, tender kisses, her left hand cupping, caressing her breast. The contact lasts a little bit longer than necessary, Kate savoring the warm sensation of Sarah's warm skin against her own.

Nothing in the air but lust and breathing.

Kate's hand travels further down, just as before, tracing small circles on Sarah's abdomen, and disappearing under the sheet.

Sarah feels warm lips on her collarbone again, on her neck, below her earlobe, everywhere. She sighs and her warm breath hits Kate's ear.

They start moving, building a rhythm, together, slowly. The act couldn't have looked more real. It's intense, and feverish.

The burning contact, Kate's hand stroking Sarah's inner thigh seductively, causes them to moan in each other's mouth, rocking in unison, skin against skin.

The lingering kisses, the frenzied caresses, the ridiculous amount of pleasure spreading through her body up and down force Sarah's eyes open. She looks away, finding a spot on the distant wall, trying to distract herself from Kate's fingers drilling into her skin. The way she feels her on her shoulder, the way she feels her between her legs… She buries her face into Kate's neck.

And then she hears it.

They both do.

« Kate… » Sarah moans into her ear, like an echo in an empty room, almost inaudible.

Kate freezes. She looks up, a hint of surprise furrows her brow, yet she wills herself to keep her hand movement going. A slower, unhurried, more sensual motion. The camera never stops rolling.

Propped on her elbow, she studies those brown sparkling eyes, attempting to steady her own rapid breath. Sarah realizes her misstep a moment too late, mortified, her cheeks reddening by the minute.

In that fraction of a second, everything is questioned.

Kate reads her face effortlessly. Conflicted, ashamed, vulnerable, exposed, Sarah is clearly about to freak out.

Taking on Shane's confidence and amorous poise, Kate immediately leans in and kisses her lips, their tongues dancing together, again, and lingering.

All is forgotten and forgiven in that moment, and the show does go on.


	9. Chapter 9

Another Monday morning. Coast Mountain Films Studios lot. Another read-through session for _The L Word_.

The cast and most of the writing staff are sitting around the long oval table in the middle of the great room. Orange juice, coffee, muffins and bagels are available for breakfast in the corner.

Everyone has a copy of the script to be reviewed today. Bottles of water, soda cans, bags, scarves, and mobile phones on mute are scattered all over the table. Laurel, Jennifer, Pam, Rachel, Erin, Mia, everyone is here. Ilene, along with the writers and director of the episode are also present.

Kate takes a seat next to Leisha. She responds to her friend's greeting with a mumble as she furtively looks across to find Sarah sitting next to Ilene and Pam. She doesn't say another word and slouches into her chair in a familiar position.

Leisha looks at Kate, then at Sarah, and senses something in the air. Sarah waits patiently across the table, smiling back nervously. Leisha looks back at Kate with a suspiciously raised eyebrow.

« What's up with you two? »

« Uh? Nothing. »

« Yeah, right. »

Leisha sighs. She flips through the pages of the script in her hand absentmindedly.

« All set for Friday? »

Kate stretches in her chair, clearing her throat, happily moving on to a new subject matter.

« Absolutely. Angela's coming, too. »

« Cool. I'm not surprised; she goes nuts for those stupid movies. »

Leisha pauses, studying Kate's eyes. They're still lowered, hidden behind a strand of disheveled dark hair, and definitely not aiming straight. She continues, « You invited anybody over? »

« No. »

« I know it's your house, your rules and all, but you're kind gonna be the fifth wheel, you realize that, right? »

Kate lights up and answers cheerfully, « Technically, it is my house, yes, but who are we kidding, _you_ make the rules. »

« Whatever, » and hoping to make her budge, Leisha adds, « I can bring someone for you if you'd like. »

« No, thank you. »

« So you _do_ have someone in mind, » she challenges again.

« Shut up already. »

Rose Lam, executive producer, kicks off the meeting, gracefully silencing the chatter. « Good morning, everyone. »

She hears a collective joyful response accompanied by smiles, and proceeds. « Before we start the read-through, Ilene and I have an announcement to make. »

She looks at Ilene playfully, who gestures for her to go ahead with the news.

« You all know that we're premiering in the New Year, and that when the show hits the air, we're done filming and already on hiatus. Well, we've decided to try something new to garner early feedback this year. We've been running these closed-door screenings of select episodes or extended episode previews. »

She pauses, taking in the attentive room. « This is to basically gauge the audience's reaction to certain character introductions, plots, subject matters and so on. »

Ilene nods in agreement and adds, « This is the first year that we're doing this, and I think that, based on the response we got from this weekend's showing, it won't be the last. »

Rose smiles discreetly. « We showed an episode to a closed audience that we shot quite recently and which mainly focused on Shane and Carmen and their budding relationship. »

Kate looks up upon hearing the mention of her character, and immediately hears Leisha quip from the side, « I think you're in trouble, Moennig. »

They both giggle under their breath and return their attention to Rose.

« Well, the response was _off_ the charts, let me tell you. »

« It's true, » Ilene proudly chimes in.

« We got a huge amount of feedback on these two, » Rose continues, pointing at Kate and Sarah, « and we couldn't be happier. The test audience just _loved_ you. Both of you. »

Rose turns to them individually with a warm smile and carries on with praise.

« And more importantly, they loved you as a couple. A lot of people commented that your sex scene was one of the best they've seen, whether on this show or anywhere else on cable television. »

Suddenly, the women around the table start to cheer informally and a round of applause follows. Kate gets a punch in the shoulder from a hysterical Leisha, while Ilene pats Sarah on the back appreciatively. Everyone smiles and comments on Rose's last words amidst a noisy and overexcited brouhaha.

« Wow, I knew you were good, » Leisha starts in the middle of it all, « I didn't know you where _that_ good. »

The wisecrack raises a few eyebrows and prompts another round of laughter.

Kate delivers a good-natured chuckle, and shrugs, as if the whole thing is out of her control regardless of her response. She catches Sarah's eyes and smiles at her. No words necessary, their bond already solidified. Sarah smiles back, the initial butterflies in her stomach quickly fading away with the outpouring of affection and support coming from the room.

Ilene jumps in, « Yes, I think we can congratulate them both on making the most of this new partnership, both on camera and off. » She pauses, regaining a more serious composure, « If I may… A few Showtime people, from the programming and executive teams, were at the showing, and I really think this episode might just get us our third season! »

Ilene turns to Kate and Sarah fondly, and starts clapping with the rest of the energized cast.

Taking her turn, Rose waits a minute and speaks up again. « Alright, before we move on, one last thing about the new _It_ couple, » she muses with finger quotes, « I don't know how this came about, and apparently it's already all over the Web, but they're calling you guys _Sharmen_. »

« Char… what? » asks Mia, frowning. « Oh, I get it. »

« This is ridiculous, that's what it is, » Erin mocks light-heartedly while the banter continues.

« I wish I had a cool made-up name like that, » Pam teases from the side, « Ilene, are you gonna give me a man to play with this year or what? »

And the room bursts into laughter once again.

« Sharmen… how about that, » Leisha ponders. « Well, so long, Tibette! »


	10. Chapter 10

Rose Troche is directing today and the atmosphere on set is both lighthearted and bubbly. Most of the cast is here. This is a group scene. The set of _The Planet_ is complete with fans and ventilators on all sides to simulate L.A.'s breeze on a cool summer night.

« Okay guys, we're all set. We've got cameras A and B on the girls at the table, and I've got C covering the dance floor from behind. »

Rose takes center stage surveying last minute details on the call sheet and the script in her hand. She motions to Lindsay, her assistant, to recap the scene out loud for everyone. The brunette starts reading, « _The Planet. Saturday night. At the table, the girls enjoy drinks amid light and playful conversation. Music plays in the background. Several people are dancing. The bar is bustling with patrons. KIT goes from table to table to say hello, making sure glasses are never empty. She finally joins BETTE and the girls at the table to enjoy a drink herself. SHANE and CARMEN find their way to the dance floor when a slower and sexy piece starts playing._ »

Jennifer, Pam, Laurel, Leisha and Rachel sit at a large table by the terrace, surrounded by extras, waiting for filming to begin. They are vivaciously engaged in good-natured banter while texting, drinking water or tea, and going over the scene's dialogue.

In the middle of the impromptu dance floor, Kate and Sarah await, standing — pacing, in fact. Kate is wearing Shane's signature black jeans and a vintage rock t-shirt. Sarah sports a pair of denim shorts and a reddish tank top; a white shirt with rolled-up sleeves tied up above her belly button completes her outfit.

Rose finally approaches them.

« You guys have it easy today, uh? »

Kate's pout is sheer expression of petulant annoyance.

Sarah rolls her eyes. « You think? »

« Sure you do. You have no dialogue in this scene, you're in the background shot, and you get to kiss in each other's arms for hours until these ladies get it right. »

« Right. » Sarah acquiesces, with a grain of apprehension, yet grateful she'll have no line to mess up this time.

Kate gets distracted a second by Leisha and Pam's crazy faces behind Rose, then dutifully returns her attention to the female director.

« Okay, seriously, I need you to just talk about whatever goes through your mind for the most part. We don't have mics on you, we just wanna show that you're having this sort of deep, lustful conversation, and that you're the cutest couple in town. »

« Lustful conversation… » Kate stretches her arms behind her head. « Can't be that hard. »

« Just chat, laugh, giggle, touch each other's hair and so on. Be cute, that's your job. Didn't I just say you had the best job of all? » Rose winks at them as Jo Ann, the make-up artist, inches towards Kate from behind.

« Don't knock me out there, champ, » she muses, and proceeds to retouch Kate's eyeliner.

Kate quickly regains a normal composure, tucking her awkward arms away, and mumbles some sort of an apology, resulting in the girls chuckling mockingly.

As Jo Ann leaves them to make herself busy at the table, Rose further explains, « Mid-point, though, we're gonna need you to kiss, to contrast the conversation at the table and Bette and Tina's relationship with yours. »

Rose opens up the script to page 42 and reads out loud, « Let me see… The script says, _SHANE and CARMEN find their way to the dance floor when a slower and sexy piece starts playing. They dance impossibly close to each other, caressing each other's arms, necks, and backs. SHANE murmurs something in CARMEN's ear that makes her smile lovingly. SHANE's lips are on CARMEN's neck, lingering there as they continue to sway to the music. CARMEN closes her eyes and tightens her grip around SHANE's neck._ »

Rose looks up from the page. « I'll be following you from behind and then I'll get the dolly-cam up close on you during the dance. »

She simulates the camera angle from the distance and points to the camera crew behind the girl's table in the background.

« We'll get the close-up of your faces when Alice says her line, something like, _Look at those two. They're so in love it makes me sick_, and we're gonna be back at the table following the rest of their conversation until the scene ends. »

« Sounds easy enough. »

Sarah looks up at Kate's relaxed composure, in admiration. « So, when do we know… »

« When to kiss? Lindsay's gonna make the switch to a Joni Mitchell song at some point, _All I Want_. That's your cue. »

« Alright. »

« I can also make crazy hand signals. »

« I think we'll be okay, Rose, » Kate assures.

Rose smiles back and disappears, hollering « Good. That's what I like to hear! »

Fifteen minutes later, Kate and Sarah are slow-dancing on set. Cameras have been rolling for a while and, as proven customary for group scenes, more than one take is needed.

Oblivious to the boisterous conviviality close by, Kate clears her throat, making meaningful eye contact with her dance partner. « So… What are you doing this weekend? »

« Not sure yet. » With a shrug.

« Well, Leisha had this great idea to put a _Zombie Night_ together at my house. »

« A what? »

« Movie night. With crazy-ass horror movies. »

« I see. »

For a moment, Sarah muses on Kate's established friendship with Leisha and the rest of the girls — their mannerisms, ways, and silly habits with each other. She realizes then she never had any real, consequential friendships with women before. Not like this. Not like she has been experiencing since this wild and unpredictable roller coaster started.

« You interested? »

Blank. Kate tilts her head and clarifies the offer. « Leisha wants to introduce me to her new girl. Her name's Nina, she's a fashion designer. They've been going out for two weeks. »

Sarah smiles with puppy-dog eyes as they continue to sway to the music unhurriedly. « Aw, seeking her best friend's approval. That's so cute. »

« I guess. Ange and Alex are coming over too, » Kate continues, referring to _L Word_ writer-director Angela Robinson and her parter Alex.

« We might even order Thai, » she teases.

Sarah frowns amusingly. « So, basically, it's gonna be me, you, and two lesbian couples at your house, for a horror movie marathon? Is that what I'm hearing? »

Kate bursts out laughing. « You make it sound bad, insane even, but it's really fun. We do this all the time, and I figured, now that you're part of the gang… »

« Thanks, I appreciate the offer. »

« So is that a yes? »

« I guess so. »


	11. Chapter 11

« Cool. » With a contented grin, Kate closes the gap between their chests, bowing her head slightly, all the while keeping a tight grip on Sarah's waist. They continue moving to the music in each other's arms, relishing every second of this close proximity, forgetful of their surroundings. In the background, conversation at the table is in full swing. Still, even after several takes and script adjustments, the energy and presence radiate from the group chemistry a few feet away.

Another _cut_, a clap from the scene slate, and Rose's commanding directions can be heard, followed by the commotion of yet another round of touch-up on the girls' make-up.

The pattern of familiar words, sounds, the resonance of overflowing voices compel Kate to shut everything and everyone out of her brain. Everyone but the woman in her arms. They move and interact center stage, but it's just the two of them, regardless of the number of extras and crew members looking on. Their own bubble. A different world altogether.

Sarah's legs feel sore now, feet hobbling on the dance floor in circles steadily. The air is humid and hot under the myriad of projectors above them. Grateful to have something to hold on to, Sarah makes sure her arms are steadily anchored around Kate's neck. But Kate has her back — her hips, that is.

Sarah feels warm hands on her waist, where long fingers rub on the fabric of her shorts. She can feel Kate's piercing stare on her and is rewarded with a warm smile and something in those green eyes that tells her not to worry about a thing.

Kate is intensely focused on her. Like nothing around matters. They connect for a brief instant before those hungry eyes, searching, pinning, descend on to Sarah's lips with envy, then pausing, surveying her cheeks, her jawline, the curve of her neck. Back to her lips. Kate's hand now traveling up and down Sarah's back slowly, spreading the heat, marking territory, their waists connected. Sarah's hold around her neck, her hand on her hip. They still breathe heavily when Sarah leans in impossibly close, wanting more, their foreheads an inch apart. Something in her chest beats painfully. She is warm all over, tingling, her body limp, her breathing erratic. She voluntarily closes her eyes for a long, long second to regain her bearings, regulating her breath, but before she can open them again she feels the sweetest sensation burning the tip of her lips. Like a shot through her heart. Kate's lips are on hers and there is no going back. All Sarah sees is the porcelain white of Kate's cheeks, and moist lips, before shutting her eyes again, letting out the faintest moan. Without an afterthought, not even considering the timing or necessities of the scene, Sarah loses herself and responds in kind. Their musical cue does not come soon enough.

As the kiss grows deeper, tongues dancing in harmony, both relax into a more comfortable, yet desperate embrace. Kate's hands roaming gently over Sarah's back, going down her spine dangerously low with each stroke, and pulling her closer at the same time. Sarah's hand encircling Kate's shoulders intimately, drawing her in. Her other hand caressing her neck in encouragement. Effortlessly. Sarah's heartbeat grows stronger now, vibrating, the palpitations making her dizzy, always wanting more. Kate's lips won't stop moving. Nibbling, sucking, caressing, savoring those full red lips with fervor. Tasting every inch of Sarah's mouth. Barely breathing. Moaning. But Kate reluctantly brings the kiss to an end, gasping for air. She realizes something at that moment.

Both of them are standing. Immobile. Frozen. Still in each other's arms. Kate wonders for a second when they stopped moving to the music. Sarah catches on, their face as close as before but not touching, their eyes locked on each other in panic. _When did the music stop? Why is it so quiet in here all of a sudden?_

In a perfectly awkward maneuver that could have been scripted, they let go of each other. Sarah pushes a strand of hazel hair behind her ear instinctively. She looks down, straightening her ruffled shirt, and glances to her left. Everyone in the room is looking at her. At them. Extras, Rose, the girls at the table directly facing them. Staring. Everyone. Pam and Leisha, both standing, exchange a mischievous grin while everyone else seems to be holding onto their thoughts. And breaths.

Probing the room, Kate clears her throat, scratching at her eyebrow.

« What? » She has that look on her face. The one that indicates she might be in trouble but doesn't know exactly why.

« Nothing, » Rachel and Laurel manage to say almost in unison. They feign a bland smile with straight faces.

Sarah looks at them in horror, like she's on the wrong side of the _Do Not Cross_ police line. She starts hearing smothered and half-suppressed laughs around the set, a couple of people avoiding her eyes in the back, some others suppressing smiles with their hands.

Leisha looks at her with a massive smile, then turns to Kate and speaks out loud, « Rose yelled _"Cut"_ like, _five_ minutes ago. That's all. »

« Oh my God… » Sarah gasps in surprise, now realizing what everyone has been staring at.

« That was hot. » Pam declares bluntly with a suggestive, raised eyebrow, impersonating Kit Porter to perfection. The statement precipitates more giggles, cheers, and a round of applause.

Kate's embarrassment quickly turns to self-deprecation. She scratches her head with a grin, rolling her shoulders with a little shrug. _It is what it is_.

Sarah, however, can feel her cheeks turning redder by the second, her stomach churning. Kate recognizes the uneasiness in her eyes. « Hey… » she mutters, raising a protective hand towards her.

But Sarah has already taken a step back. She turns around and disappears behind one of the Planet's portable background walls.

Kate follows suit. As she steps away, she hears something about another take with the girls, more lighting and less extras in the scene. Ruckus returns to the set almost immediately with everyone going back to their places and preparing for the next shot. She finds Sarah tucked away where it's noticeably quieter and cooler due to the lack of overhead projectors. Sarah's back is facing her when she approaches from behind. She pauses a minute, thinking of what to say.

« Hey… it's alright. » She takes a step closer. « They're just teasing. Don't worry about it. »

Sarah surprises her by turning around instantly. Much to Kate's relief, there are no tears, but an adorable rosy shade on Sarah's cheeks.

« Don't worry about it? » A tinge of annoyance in her voice.

« Well, yeah, I mean... » Kate stammers, involuntary pausing.

« I don't think I can do this. »

Kate blinks her eyes nervously. « You _are_ doing this. And you're great at it. »

Sarah takes a few steps, unconscious of her pacing up and down. « I'm lost, that's what I am! » she gives away, throwing a hand in the air.

« Are we still talking about what just happened? »

Sarah stops, looking straight at her. « I'm completely out of my comfort zone, I'm stressed out, I'm, I'm confused, I'm wondering what I'm doing half the time, and… » Her ranting hurried and heartfelt.

« What? »

« And yet... »

As Sarah blanks out, Kate takes another step forward, her voice brimming with compassion, « You can tell me. »

The brunette sighs heavily, lowering her eyes.

« I thought this would be good for me, you know? I thought it would give my career an edge. I thought I'd go up to Canada for a few months, rent a house in the woods, and do this little show about L.A. lesbians. »

« Mmmm… » Kate ponders, smirking. « Your house is definitely not in the woods. »

_Smart-ass_.

Sarah rolls her eyes, thankful for the distraction.

She exhales again solemnly; looks left and right as if to delay the inevitable. « I thought I'd be bored out of my mind in this country, » she confesses, « and freeze my ass off, with no friends, nothing to do but work, and instead… » she pauses, her discourse strained and emotive. « And instead, I find myself surrounded by these incredible women, this energy… I have the best time on set, I'm learning so much, and I love everything about this job. »

« And you didn't expect that. »

« No, not at all! Sure, I knew I'd have to kiss a girl or two, maybe show some skin, nothing I haven't done before, clearly… »

« _Clearly_… » Kate chimes in, referring to her cheerleading days for the Dallas Cowboys.

Sarah suppresses a giggle. « Shut up. »

Poise and melancholy soon reclaim her features. Her voice softer than before. « But I'm here, on set with you, day in and day out, playing your girlfriend, and we're kissing and holding hands, and making out every single day, and… »

Kate suddenly feels the need to interject and apologize, feeling anxious. « Look, I know this is a bit much sometimes… »

« I miss it. »

She squints her eyes in disbelief, listening, unraveling.

« I miss it on the weekends, I miss it when we're not filming for two days. I miss what we have during the day as those damn characters. And it's not even real! »

Dejected, but feeling relieved, Sarah awaits for some kind of response. Kate stares back at her, paralyzed in front of her for the first time.

Her face raw and open, Sarah confesses one more thing without holding back, « I get home at night and I miss you, okay? » Her temper rising, reproachful, almost accusatory.

Kate takes everything in quickly. She regains her cool, a smile reaching the corner of her mouth.

« Okay, geez, no need to be mean about it. »

Sarah lets out a sigh of relief, smiling back.

« Let's… » Kate looks out in the distance, looking for inspiration.

« Let's what? »

She stares back at Sarah with conviction. « Let's do something about it. »


End file.
